To get your attention: Harry Kewell! Tim Cahill! Lucas Neill! (Double-L surnames!?) Handsome men!
This is: the Australian national football team! (totes not obvious, yah?)
The bosses: Football Federation Australia (FFA)
Represent!: Asian Football Confederation
Deck out in: green and gold
Y’all know us as: the Socceroos (as if you couldn’t tell by the very subtle font above)
Flyin’ low without this sponsor: Qantas Airlines (full name: Qantas Socceroos)... which is good because the boys do shittonnes of travelling
Fashion statement: Nike
HBIC Coach: Holger Osieck
HBIC Captain: the dashingly handsome Lucas Neill
In line for FIFA’s throne: (as of 15 December 2010) rank #26
Haters: to the far left
Kangaroos: are totally badass
The Socceroos pre-2006, the move to the AFC, our Asian Cup and World Cup campaigns, the coaches who took us there, our kickass Women’s team (who WON THE 2010 WOMEN’S ASIAN CUP(!!!!!) I might ever-so-subtly add), and the men’s team’s 2011 Asian Cup squad members. All here (with a healthy dose of tl;dr) under the cuts!
Note that I will mostly stick to calling it “soccer", because that’s generallyyyyy what we’re used to calling it in Australia (SOCCERoos, y/y?). We have another sport, Australian Rules football (or AFL (Australian Football League) for short), which is what we refer to as "football" or "footy", so it gets a bit confusing. And for the record, it is NOTHING like the ‘football’ most of you know. AFL is more like a bastardisation of chaotic rugby with a bit more kicking. But then, I’m a biased soccer fan, sooo...
Now, without further ado, obligatory kangaroo invites you in!
(that’s my pet kangaroo, her name is Milly and she is 2 years old*. :’)
*I am joking. We do not generally keep kangaroos as pets in Australia.
And so, we begin...
( Pre-2006: Australia With The OFC, Or The 31 - 0 Thrashing Of American Samoa And MoreCollapse )
( Road to 2006: Australia’s Qualification And First World Cup Appearance Since 1974Collapse )
( From OFC to AFC: Australia Moving OnCollapse )
( 2007 AFC Asian Cup: Not Quite The Impact We Had Hoped ForCollapse )
( Road to 2010: The Socceroos’ Rollercoaster RideCollapse )
( 2011 AFC Asian Cup: The Next JourneyCollapse )
( 2010, The Matildas: The Awesome HBICs AKA Our Australian Women’s TeamCollapse )
( The Coaches: The Head Honchos Of The SocceroosCollapse )
( The Squad: The 2011 Asian Cup SocceroosCollapse )
( Australia for 2015 AFC Asian CupCollapse )
And so concludes this extremely long-winded Socceroos 101. How will we fare in the 2011 Asian Cup, and eventually, the qualifiers for the 2014 Brazil World Cup? Only time will tell.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Australian national team, our beloved Socceroos.
Dancing John Travolta and Tim Cahill thanks you for your time.
(and so does Milly! :D)
Sources: Wikipedia, Google, Australian FourFourTwo, Zimbio, various Australian news sources, cute kangaroo photo is from here
Disclaimer: I wasn’t kidding when I said tl;dr ok!!!
(If I have left out anything you feel is important, please don’t hesitate to let me know, and I’ll try to incorporate it into the 101!)