All I want for Christmas are more Chelsea goals
Drogba is number one.
Number one at giving hugs.
At least they still follow the rules of a proper Chelsea celebration. At least three players must be present.
You must smile even if it makes your jaw hurt.
Awkward sexual moments optional, check to see if the situation allows for it.
The only complement I can ever think of for Anelka is that he has a nice face, because he really does.
Anelka makes sure his cheeks are nice and warm for winter.
This is unrelated to his ability to score, which he can do with or without a beard.
The beard does seem to induce more smiles.
Or maybe he's just smiling because all the blood is rushing to his head.
Option B) He's smiling at Drogba's "I'm a little teapot" dance
Joey is, after all, quite easy to imitate.
Put on something blue and run around a lot.
You don't have to worry about smiling at the camera.
Just make sure your thighs are showing and let your face do whatever it wants.
Joey impression, you're doing it right.
You're allowed to have some good moments.
Joey takes the time to tell the ref about how big this one girls boobs were.
He knows how to captivate an audience.
Lamps doesn't think it's fair for Fellaini to attach a balloon to his head to help increase his jumping, but the ref's too busy to care.
Drogba's never too busy to score
Drogba has a bit of a smiling malfunction.
His teammates misread this and assume that Drogba wants a kiss, so they stay away.
Or rather, they run away.
Sideline Reality from Ancelotti
What, do you want presents this year?
You're going to have to earn them.
And you're not doing a good job of it right now.
Don't worry though, of course I still love you as much as I love gesturing with my hand
All Carlo wants is some silverware
Reality sucks, thighs are better.
We're really going to miss Drogba in January :(